Man, it's freaking 2:30 in the morning and I'm still working on the hate crimes presentation I have to give in Fullerton. I HATE WAKING UP EARLY. I feel like I’m in school again. BLEAH! I'm going to be soooo pooped since I have a freakin' MANAA meeting later that day in LA. Yeah, I get to battle the 405. 8( Cruel, cruel world. And why do I keep saying freakin'. DAMM YOU ALL!!!!!!

BTW I'll be posting a "nice" rant on why #$%@^ guys suck. Okay, not all guys, gay guys are wonderful. 8) Seriously, I’ve been pretty depressed and down, because of all the crapola I’ve had to deal with that OTHER gender. (But Pason you don’t count, you rock. Sorry for the waterworks and thanks for listening and understanding. Going to miss my fellow couch potato bud.) What happened to me this past weekend has gotten me only a lot more jaded and cynical on that fuckin’ thing called love. I only know so well, when guys hate it when girls give them, the whole “let’s be friends” deal. Shiiit. Yeah, I have a potty mouth, whatja goin to do about, JACKASS! (Good lawd, I’m suppose to speak to teachers today? Ai-yo!)

But back to my luvlies…lately, it’s been mainly gay guys that have given my self-esteem a boost, as well as with a smile on my face. They don’t leave me with tears of heartache and pains but tears from laughing too hard. I swear, I’m with a group of people, that has as a *ahem* creative mind as me. Maybe I’m a gay guy trapped in a breeder’s body. Dammit, why do I have to like guys? And why do I attract the ones, I attract. Aren’t there any nice ones that will have the decency to call me back, remember my birthday, keep their word, don’t have an Asian fetish, won’t flake, won’t demean and make me feel inferior, won’t forget that he made a date with me, aren’t cheap asses, not use me, break my heart and the list goes on. 8( Yeah, do I know how to choose them or what?

It would be so nice, if there someone, who would like to be more than friends, who would return the snuggle, would actually call me his date and actually really take me out on an ACTUAL date, would ask me to dance, would remember my name after the first introduction (geez, like Jennifer is a REALLY hard name to remember), was interested in me and not one of my friends ...*sigh* And before you start saying hey you can ask the guy out, I have, and I’ve paid for both our dinners, I’ve paid for the movie, I’ve driven and I usually am the one doing the asking for slow dances. Man, my middle name should be doormat. Geez, I’m sad. And I’m publishing this for the whole worldwide web to see.

Okok, I went on a lil longer than I was going to. And I really need to get back the presentation. So I’ll stop before I really get myself into a terrible funk. But don’t worry I have more to say. Volume 53453246236 is on its way. And with my record, there’s only more to come. Yes, you may now start playing the violins.

Jen of Kuo, the fag hag in training